A Bad Hair Day.......

Day 16 from my first chemo was the dreaded hair day. Dr. Litton prepared me to be ready for for the "fallout" which would hit day sixteen - give or take two days either way. My darling hairdresser brought over a pair of chic pink buzzers for the event and so we waited. Day sixteen (Thurs 8/14) it was coming out by the handfulls, but over the years everyone has told me I have enough hair for two people, and for the first time I knew what they were talking about. I was lucky enough to have enough of my own hair left to go to a wedding shower on Friday night, and lunch on Saturday (looking thin, but still got the thumbs up from Shan). However, Saturday evening Mike and I were working out in the front yard when a neighbor drove up in his car to say hello. We walked to the curb to chat for a minute when a gust of wind hit and yes, you can imagine seeing a huge lock of my hair fly down the street. I casually held my hand over my eyes to block the "sun" and when he left I looked at Mike and his only comment was, "you definitely need to wear your wig to dinner tonight". The girls had been waiting for the big day of the shaving party, so Saturday evening we gathered in my bathroom and everyone had a go at it (except Emrey). She watched from the doorway, but just couldn't do it. Haley, Abbey and Sofey had a ball taking turns with the sissors and shavers and Shannon and Mike finished the job. We all laughed our heads off and found out that no one needs hair quite as bad as grandma does, and we're all grateful that it will grow back. For now I'm sporting my wig and hats and my workout/sleeping wig (modeled by the girls) which I refer to as my "HAIRSPAY" wig. Luckily the bangs are detachable so they have become Sofey's new hairpiece which she velcros to her own bangs. Actually I think I look like John Travolta when I wear it, but only those of you who will be sleeping over get to see that little transformation. Brandon was here last night and had a good laugh. Maybe down the road I'll be brave enough to leave the house in hats and scarves, but for now I depend pretty much on my one good wig. I have to say one thing about cancer, it is impossible to prepare yourself for all the new and "exciting" things you get to experience on a daily basis. Those of you who have gone through this either for yourself, or a loved one can relate. I am however very grateful that I don't have to experience everything all at once, and never alone. The Lord in his mercy carries us through each phase tenderly, lovingly, and if we lean on Him we gain strength to carry on. Having Shannon and her family here has been a tremendous blessing. Now that most of the really tough stuff is behind me it will be easier to let the girls go back to school which starts Monday, and I can be excited about the progress they're making on their new home. Mike has been an absolute trooper, and continues to strengthen me and bouy me up. He even lies about how beautiful I am. Well, you know what they say: "Love is blind" and I'm sure grateful for that! Once again, thank you, thank you, thank you for your love and constant prayers. I fall short in so many ways, but your prayers are heard on my behalf, and I love and thank you for it. I've loved visits from you and hope to see you if you're ever in South Jordan. My love and gratitude to all.
Shirlene

The Men In My Life

My daughters and granddaughters mean the world to me, as you know. They have all taken exceptional care of me (I think Shannon had to bathe, dress, and do my hair 21 times) and it is imposssible for me to express my gratitude adequately. However, I know I would not make it through this without the wonderful men in my life as well.
My plastic surgeon is a wonderful man (his wife is a breast cancer survivor)and he reminded me today that many husbands can't take the pressure of taking care of a wife with breast cancer, and many end up getting divorced. It made me think again of how blessed and grateful I am for my exceptional husband. He is my best friend and support. I'm especially grateful for the miracles I've received from his priesthood blessings. I'm also extremely grateful for my wonderful sons. Jaren has to put up living with his mother-in-law (can you imagine!?) and is so sweet and helpful. He's also Mike's favorite riding pal and I'm thankful for that, too. Chris, Brandon, and Taylor have been faithful in calling me and I've enjoyed long happy conversations on a regular basis. Their love and devotion gives me the courage to carry on. I'm so proud of the fabulous husbands, fathers, and priesthood holders they are. They are an inspiration to me.
Now if you've seen my the rest of my blog, you'll notice the other two men in my life. They're the ones holding the We love grandma sign. Ian and Colton. They call me regularly from NY and Ian always sings a primary song to me (all verses!). I can't even tell you how much I miss them and cannot wait until I get to see them again. Thanks guys for your love and support. I couldn't do this without you!!!

New York Love

We love you sooooo very much. Sending you lots of HUGS and KISSES. Can't wait to see you.

no wasting time

Today was day two since Shirlene had her first chemotherapy treatment. She is doing great. She seems to have two paces. Either extremely energetic and anxious or passed out exhausted. She has been waiting patiently to get up to Midway to find some home decor for her house and decided today was the day. We were completely shocked that she would have the energy to go but she had her mind made up and said she definately felt up to it. I also think she is growing slightly tired of her house since she's spent so much time in it this past month. I know she also did it for me knowing I wanted to get there before I had to head back home tomorrow. So for those reasons and with Shirlene feeling up to it we made it there this afternoon and all found fun, unique decor for our homes. We ended up having a late lunch and enjoyed the car ride home sleeping, except for Shannon who had to drive of course.

My girls and I have had a great time being here with Shirlene and Mike and Shannon's family. We are going to miss being so close but know we'll be back up soon. Shirlene, you're amazing! Thank you for the great example you've always been and continue to be to us. We love you.

For Olivia

This is a special post for Olivia, Grandma loves you and she is in no pain and is doing great. This picture was taken after her 1st chemo treatment today.

Chemo begins

Noon tomorrow will be my first chemotherapy. For those of you in the know the drugs I'll be given are Taxotere, Carboplatin and Herceptin. I looked them up on the internet to see all the fun I'm in for and if you're interested you'll find them on www.chemocare.com/bio Mike, Shannon and I went to a chemo class last week and I chose Mondays as my treatment day so that I'll be feeling good by the weekend. Treatments will be every 21 days with December 7th being the last one. Each treatment will last about 4 hours. We were told in class that the first few days can be rough, but by day 4 or 5 I should be feeling pretty good, and if I don't have too many side effects I could even do a little traveling on the second or third week (NYC here I come!) Dr. Litton said he has a patient who goes skiing after therapy, and other patients who are positive he is trying to kill them. He said, "I'm not saying this isn't real......for them", but he suspects I'll be somewhere in between although I'd like to think I'll be up for skiing! Dr. Allred was able to remove my drains on Monday and Dr. Anderson gave me thumbs up to start using my arms on Wednesday so I've been in heaven these last few days as I can finally shower, dress, and do my own hair. It was also great to be able to go to church for the first time in weeks today. The priests in my ward have been bringing the sacarament to my home and while I have considered this a wonderful blessing there is nothing like fellowshipping with the saints, and feeling the spirit there. The Lord has blessed me abundantly with loving, caring family, friends, neighbors, and ward members whom I love dearly. I can't say I'm grateful to have breast cancer, but I am grateful to have my eyes opened to the tender mercies of the the Lord because of it. Once again, thanks for your love and support. It's been great to see so many of you, and I look forward to more visits.

Thanks to Dawn and Kristen for posting pictures (I have no idea how to do it). The girls had such a fun time while they were all in Utah. I had to pass on the activities until Wednesday when Dawn and I took Zoe and Tatym to Liberty Park.

Wigging Out!

I think I'm a really good sport to let the girls post these pictures!!! We did have a blast shopping for my wig after a fun birthday lunch at Zin's for Kristen. The girls talked me into going for the one with highlights so when I'm not sporting the shinny cranium this will be my new look. I went for an EKG and more blood tests today, then visited with the surgeon's nurse to see if I could have the last two drains removed (I promise that is NOT my stomach) but unfortunately they will continue to be my very close friends for a few more days. It has been absolutely fabulous having family here. Chris and his family are on their way home, but Brandon and Dawn joined us last weekend and they'll be here for awhile. I've loved watching all the granddaughters laugh and play and dance and have good times together. Kristen and Dawn have been so sweet and helpful. I don't know many daughters-in-law who would help their fat, old mother-in-law the way they have, but it's been good for Shan to have a break. It has really lifted my spirits to have so much family around and I know it is a sweet tender mercy from the Lord. I've had a couple of surprise visits from Arizona friends as well - what a treat! I love having visitors. Thank you all for your continued love and prayers. I could not do this without your help.